The Expectation Detox: A Mindset Shift for Public Sector Leaders

People who work in public service are some of the best, most committed people I know. You show up early, stay late, and carry the weight of the community on your shoulders. But there’s a silent force that’s draining your energy and stealing your joy: expectations.

We all have them - expectations of how staff should perform, how Council should respond, how the public should act. However, the truth is that expectations are often premeditated disappointments.

When things don’t go as we “expect”:

• We get frustrated with others.

• We beat ourselves up.

• We question our leadership.

And it’s not necessarily because we’re doing something wrong - it’s because we’re following an invisible script that no one else can read, and that has been produced - or “made up” - over our years of experience. It’s our rule book for how the world should act, what people should do, and how things should go.

But what what if…instead of clinging to expectations, we started to lead with intention - and more importantly with responsibility?

Responsibility is the ability to respond. It’s not about blame - it’s about power. When we take responsibility, we reclaim our ability to choose how we respond to what is happening around us.

Here’s what I mean:

• Instead of expecting your team to “just get it,” you set the intention to communicate clearly - and take responsibility for how you show up as a leader.

• Instead of expecting Council to understand why you need the budget as requested, you set the intention to educate them - and take responsibility to bridge that gap.

• Instead of expecting the public to notice everything that’s getting done for the community, you set the intention to serve with integrity - and take responsibility for your own sense of purpose.

The mindset shift is subtle but profound. You stop reacting to unmet expectations and start responding with clarity, calm and control. You choose what actions you take - instead of waiting for someone else to do something.

Expectations make you reactive. Response-ability makes you resilient - and a bit of a rock star!

Questions to Ask Yourself If You Want to DETOX EXPECTIONS:

• Where am I holding expectations that are making me resentful or discouraged?

• What intention can I set instead - that aligns with who I want to be as a leader?

• How can I take responsibility, not for everything, but for how I respond?